An Early Anniversary Post

With less than two months until our 3rd wedding anniversary, I think it is safe to say that Alex and I are no longer newlyweds. Some people mean that term to refer to someone who has been married one year or less while some use the term more broadly to mean someone who has recently been married. I decided to stop using the term "newlywed" when I realized that Alex and I were married before Pinterest became available to the general public. My wedding was one of the very last weddings to be had without the "Pinterest influence." Whether that is a good thing or a bad thing, I'll never know, but I've heard a few pre-Pinterest brides jokingly request they get a wedding day do-over.

If I'm going to be honest, I also realized that I was no longer a newlywed when conversations with my married girlfriends went from ideas, planning and relishing over the day to what we would have done differently or what we would have changed if we, in fact, did have a wedding day do-over. 

When I first realized this, I cringed and scolded myself because I remembered, "It's not about the wedding, it's about the marriage." But as I thought about it, I am so THANKFUL that we are critiquing our weddings. I'd rather critique flower arrangements, ceremony music, bridesmaids dresses, wedding cakes and party decorations than asking questions such as,

"What could I have done to keep us from falling apart?"

"How could I have not seen this coming?"

"Why did we get married in the first place?"

I would much rather chit-chat with my friends about little details we would change if we got a wedding day do-over than come close to asking any of the questions above. 

I remember that during the months leading up to our wedding day, I was overwhelmed. Not only was I trying to plan a wedding {without a wedding planner}, I felt like we would never finish our pre-marital counseling requirements. The sessions never ended. We met with the minister who married us and did some homework for him. We took a weekly class at our church with other engaged couples. We met with an older married couple at least 6 times for in-depth, personal counseling. We spent days and weeks learning all we could about how to build a Godly marriage. While it was overwhelming in concordance with planning, I AM SO GLAD WE DID THE WORK. I am glad that I missed some little details that might have made my wedding DAY more enjoyable, but I am thankful I didn't slack off when it came to learning how to be a godly wife. 

My advice to those who are about to enter into God's beautiful gift of marriage is do the work. But do the work where it counts. Make time for the things that may not look as glamorous on the outside but will serve you wonders as you learn how to be husband and wife. If you can achieve both, go for it! I hope your wedding day and marriage are just as beautiful. But if you find yourself two or three years down the road starting to critique the day, you'll know you did your job.

"Haven't you read," he replied, "that at the beginning the Creator 'made them male and female,'  and said, 'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh' ? So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate." Matthew 19:4-6

Happy early 3rd anniversary, honey bunch!

I love you!

Forever & Always