Thursday, November 1, 2012

We're Adopting! Some FAQ...

Many of our closest friends and family members already know, but Alex and I are currently in the process of adopting a little girl! This post is kind of challenging for me to write because I am going to try to answer questions that I have never felt the need to ask anyone myself. The questions we most often get are: 

Why do you want to adopt your FIRST child?

Why are you adopting internationally? 
Isn't adoption expensive? 
How do you go about adopting a child? 
Why not adopt a child from the United States? 
When will you have kids of your own? 

While these are valid questions, they are just questions I've never considered asking an adoptive parent. For Alex and I, we individually wanted to adopt before we ever met one another. Alex has family members who have adopted and been adopted, and I have never thought twice about adopting a child into my family. We know more than a dozen children who have been adopted from all around the world. Adoption is very common within our social circles and families. When I get asked WHY we are adopting, I have to remind myself that other people have different family backgrounds and adoption might not be a common occurrence to them. While it is common for us, we are not adopting because it is the thing to do. Throughout our marriage, we have always asked God to lead us in the direction that He would have us take, in any situation. He has been faithful in placing certain desires in our hearts and even when the desires might not be there, He patiently reminds us that obedience to Him is what He requires. Thankfully, this desire to adopt has been growing in our hearts for years and years and years, and He has shown us that this is the right season in our lives for pursuing this avenue and trusting that He will provide all we need.



"For everything there is a season, and a time for everything under heaven" Ecclesiastes 3:1

"Besides, God is able to make every blessing of yours overflow for you, so that in every situation you will always have all you need for any good work." 2 Corinthians 9:8

Choosing to adopt internationally rather than domestically I can't really explain any better than saying that God has laid this specific plan on our hearts right now. Perhaps we will adopt domestically someday... I just can't pretend to know what God will call us to when those future moments come. We are focusing on here and now. (Well... here & there and now) :)

In regards to adoption being expensive, YES it is! But we have seen God provide for our families time and time again and are confident that He will provide. We aren't putting Him to the test, but rather, we are allowing Him to show the faithfulness that He has promised to us once more. The Lord is faithful, and of that we are confident. 

We are also confident that the Lord will bless us with {hopefully} many biological children someday. If anyone knows me well, they know that I have been known to always have a plan. And a Plan B. And a Plan C. I'm the type of person that knows if you want something, you have to go get it. Things are not going to just fall in your lap. You have to be active in achieving what you want. The only bad thing about always having a plan is realizing how much time you wasted planning the moment God interrupts it. That is why ever since Alex and I got married, I ditched having the plan. I have honestly not had a plan, and while I thought it would be so limiting in achieving what I wanted, it has been the most freeing 2+ years. I feel like a completely different person, and the best part is that I get to live in the MOMENT. There is so much to enjoy and appreciate when you live in the moment. When we were engaged/married and people started asking us about when we would be having kids, I really didn't have any answer! My typical response has been: "If it happens now, we're so excited about it, but if it's 5+ years than that is awesome too!" It's hard when everyone wants the estimated time of baby's arrival, but we've enjoyed living in the moment and enjoying each other and this beautiful gift of marriage. It truly is a gift. 

My biggest piece of advice to engaged couples/newlyweds is to live in the moment and enjoy the NOW. There will always be the friend who is planning a wedding, buying a house, having a baby, getting a puppy, having another baby, starting a career, going on vacation, adopting a child, moving across the country. The possibilities are endless. There will always be someone doing something else. Forget THEIR life and enjoy your own. We constantly compare ourselves to what everyone else is doing, like God made a template for how we should live life. The only template that He gave us was to love Him and be faithful to Him. Period. Talk about freedom. Freedom from dullness, freedom from comparison, freedom from unmet expectations. God's ultimate desire is to give us a full life. Take His word for it!

"I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full." John 10:10

So yes, I really don't have a plan. It's gone... out the window. I also know that if you're reading this, you probably want more details. What country? How old? I promise that that information will come. But for now we are waiting to share that information. If this post was more confusing than helpful, I apologize. But please stay tuned as we will be posting regular updates. We are so excited to become parents to this little girl who we somehow love in our hearts, even though we've never seen her face. I don't know if this journey will take 9 months or 3 years, but I trust God will see it to completion if we remain faithful. Please pray for us on this journey. 



2 comments:

  1. This is really exciting news and the little girl you will be adopting just doesn't know how lucky she is going to be! Good luck with this new adventure in your life!

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  2. International or domestic – it does not really matter as long as you follow your calling. Take time to figure out the real answers for those questions. What matters is that you both know from your heart that this (adoption) is what you really want, and you’re not just riding along with the social circles. Dean Glover @ Adoption Network

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